Taking a swipe at medical clinics

“The x-ray of your skull shows a large, flabby mass floating inside. I have to consult my colleagues to be certain, but it looks like a long sausage snarled into a lump.” ― Benson Bruno.

H I G H  T E C H  M E D I C A L  C O N F U S I O N

My partner Susan’s Wednesday Word Prompt was SNIPPET.

While Susan is bravely battling the many obvious ills that are plaguing the Word Press bureaucracy I am concluding my own two week hiatus to have my medical checkup completed as quickly and painlessly as possible.

My family physician’s office called recently and asked me to drop by and visit him about a recent test result. The tests in previous years were never placed in recall mode but my last complete physical was over 18 months ago and worry wart that I am began to wonder what had gone wrong.

The appointment was set for late last Friday and the doctor informed me that he needed two more tests to complete the examination: (1) a chest X-ray and a test for my thyroid gland. 

Monday of this week I visited a newly opened family medical center that specialized in chest X rays , mammograms and a few other areas..

I had a five minute wait ( no appointment necessary) and the procedure was over in under ten minutes. No big deal.

Two days later I visited the doctor’s office again. Apparently the lab tech had botched the X rays and my physician needed a new set taken. I did not question his judgement.

The next day I once again visited the same clinic and after another ten minute wait I was escorted to the area where the X rays were taken. 

This time the procedure was a lot more bizarre. They had to take three new sets of photos because they could not “position” me correctly to capture a total view of my chest. 

I  am not that tall a person but they were asking me to assume a limbo position with my back against the machine’s back board and to extend my feet out from my body a distance well beyond my ability.

The trainee lab tech was constantly conferring with her supervisor and they were positioning the machine in altitudes and attitudes that would make the interrogation team from the Spanish Inquisition squeamish. 

I told them I was not a young person and the stretching positions they wanted me to assume would work if I were a practicing contortionist. They did not appreciate the humor in my comment. 

After a grueling 20 minutes of my twisting, shouting and squirming they finally took a compromise X ray set and dismissed me from their sacred presence.

This and other experiences I am currently undergoing with the medical profession are convincing me to get my  annual physicals on time. 

It seems to me that new trainees ( rookies) seem to populate many of the medical facilities patients depend upon.

Happily I had my heating pad and a few Advil to get me through the rougher part of the experience. 

I once again learned to speak up and question whatever procedure medical professionals want to subject me too.

Word Prompt Snippet

12 comments

  1. I disagree with you, at 6ft you are a tall man and if you can’t manage the positions they expect of you how on earth can an average person do it. I hope the young radiographers are given more training.
    And I hope the medical staff sort you out soon, this has gone on for far too long and it’s worrying. ☹️

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  2. I’d worry about the radiation exposure for all those x-rays. Oh, yeah–try explaining that to them! On second thought, Gerry–never mind. Fingers crossed they took them correctly this time.

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  3. Since I can’t stand on my own was told to hold onto a bar above my head while they took a chest xray, so I was just dangling. It’s amazing what happens. Check out my post named you’ve got to see this” and be glad you don’t live in Wisconsin

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    • It is amazing that “young” lab techs who administer these tests cannot appreciate the fact that many patients cannot totally comply with their wishes. It took me a few days of rest and Advil to survive the last such medical torture.

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